I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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