The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.