Dude i fell asleep inside of her
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.