Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im six kinds of drunk right now
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
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