Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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