you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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