woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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