i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
