i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize