he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
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