id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
