Fuck appropriateness.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize