Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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