you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
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Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
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I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is