I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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