if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
