How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
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