I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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