Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
its not stalking. its research.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
