..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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