you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
