he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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