I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
