Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
