I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
