This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
