so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
