I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize