Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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