Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Randomize
