come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
