answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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