the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
only you would photoshop your dick
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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