Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Randomize
