I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Only a mothe r could love this liver
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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