And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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