I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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