we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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