I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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