Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
