i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'm too high and old for this...
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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