rhymes with "ouble enetration"
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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