I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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