My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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