the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize