I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
