I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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