K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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