So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
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