i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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