You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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