he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
