I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
you had me at cake vodka
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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